Victor: No boaters please

I WAS rather bemused by the reference when explaining its Waterfront magazine Canal & River Trust stated it had inspiration from ‘Men Only'—a soft porn magazine!

However, with a little research, it seems that the title goes back to 1935 with the founder C. Arthur Pearson setting out his editorial stall by saying 'We don't want women readers—we won't have women readers...'.

With its total lack of anything boating within its glossy covers, perhaps CaRT is now telling us 'We don't want boating readers—we won't have boating readers...'

But how much?

I just wonder how much that little effort cost? But more to the point how much do the 10 fundraising team cost, and just what do they do?

Yes, my friends, we now have 10 people engaged in fundraising, all given impressive titles and needless to say all receiving impressive salaries. It started with just four, and though it has by no means reached anywhere near its target of 'Friends'—for which I expect they are 'needed'—Cart added six more.

What on earth do such people, oh yes, and their support staff, find to do? One thing for sure, we are not going to be told.

Eh?

The Birkenhead based Flynn Refrigeration has now brought out an air conditioning unit especially for narrowboats, obviously believing we are in need of a bit of cold air.

Perhaps another who wants to cash-in on this so-called climate change, when we are being led to believe we will all be roasting hot in our narrowboats!

He should have been with us around the Four Counties—it certainly wasn't air conditioning that was needed. In fact I cannot remember a day over the past few years when such an expensive addition would have been required. Being on water with the bow and stern doors open does the trick very well thank you.

Going quackers

Now that we are to have duck lanes on our towpaths, won't this require a training scheme to get them to use it? Or is that perhaps risky for me to suggest in view of Cart's fascination with all things stupid?

And Bill Ridgeway suggested to me that now having a dedicated lane, ducks should not defecate outside their lane. And asks if we can also hear about a Duck Anti-defecating Training Scheme?

Missed two

With it being a Bank Holiday we missed a couple more canal stoppages—with both the Narrow and Broad Huddersfield being closed.

The Narrow, we were told, was closed at Milnsbridge on Friday 22nd between locks 12 and 13, though the notice omitted as to whether it was East or West.  It was East at Milnsbrook. The reason, a 'leak', with the pound having to be lowered.

The Broad was also closed on Friday at Lock 5, due this time to a boat clouting the tail gate and making it inoperable. Though this has been repaired.

We all must have seen those boaters who literally barge about, having little care for the infrastructure, so perhaps when they damage a lock they should be brought to book and made to pay for it...  It would soon have an effect on those of a similar bent.

Victor Swift